I wake up in the morning with a...boy? #wtf

Whether or not YOU have done it, we all know someone who has. That fun evening that ends up leading into an even more fun night, a "nightcap." Spending a night with someone can be more complicated than it might seem. Every decision you make after accepting an invitation to go up to someones room needs to be thought through in great detail. How far to let them go (or try to go), whether to spend the night, the proper manners when waking up in the morning, the walk-of-shame, and finally, seeing them again. All of the decisions you make could potentially have major ramifications in your social life and image thereafter.

How far do you go? A wrong answer could leave you with a reputation ranging from super skank to major prude. This will depend on the person you are with. Second base for one person could be super slutty, while for another it could be embarrassingly boring. Should you spend the night, at a certain point you will wake up (duhh..). And when this happens, a. you will either have to lay there while your partner sleeps, awkwardly thinking about what you've done, b. you will elect to sneak out of bed and leave them before he/she awakes, c. wake up to realize that the person has already woken up and gone through this same thought process on his/her own. Once, I woke up to find myself alone in the boy's room with just his roommate, who informed me that the boy I had spent the night with had left to run a marathon. Normal.

Then comes the after-effects. First is the walk-of-shame, or as I like to say, walk-of-awesome. While for most people this trudge might suggest something demeaning, I like to see it as an either an accomplishment or flop, but nevertheless, something that you did, and you should hold your head high as you show it off. The key characteristics of someone on a walk of shame are:

-Clothes that don't hit them (belonged to the person they slept with)
-Clothes clearly for a night out (short skirt, dress shirt, etc)
-Heels in hand (girls only)
-Make up down the face (girls....or maybe guys..?)
-Missing articles of clothing
-Simply being awake before 10am on a Saturday or Sunday

The clip above is from a TV show called Cougar Town, and is a scene in which the character Laurie has her first "walk of awesome" in a while.

Then, especially at a small school like Skidmore, you WILL see your late-night partner, and you WILL have to deal with them. At D-Hall, at the Spa, in class, at another party. And at that point, you will have to make perhaps the most crucial decision so far. To a. try for another time, b. try to be friends, or c. avoid that person like the plague. Most people elect option c.

xoxo,

Sean Jesse Parker